"If you know others are dealing with it, it feels more normal. You think, Wow! I can work through it too. Adoptive parents will like this book, too, to see how they can better understand the adoptee experience."
Lera (19)
Russia
For Anyone Who Wants to Understand the Heart of an Adoptee
You Are Not Alone
If you’re a teen with adoption in your story, there are probably a lot of things your friends and family just don’t understand—no matter how much they love you. Do you ever wish you had someone to talk to about the good, the bad, and the completely confusing parts of being adopted—someone who would totally get it?
You aren’t alone. In over 30 short stories, teenagers and young adults, who were ready to tell, shared what it was like being a teenager and adopted too, the ups and downs included. For all, questions surfaced about birth family and reunion. For others, insecurities had seeped in from seemingly nowhere. For some unexplained anger or lingering anxiety nudged way too often. Of course sorrow and loss made many appearances in one form or another. And being thankful and loving their families? It welled up over and over again. They open up about it all.
Journey with teens like you who get it. Let them equip you and give you a safe place to process what may be going on with you too. They would say we need stories. We need each other. We need to be real and tell it like it is and encourage each other well on this journey of healing and wholeness. We’ve Been There not only shares what they learned but also what they wish someone had told them.
Parents, this resource is just as valuable for you. The more you understand – the more you dive into what adoptees are thinking, feeling, and experiencing – the better able you are to support, soothe, encourage, and come alongside your child during this sensitive time of life.
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"This book is easy to read and filled with affirming aha moments. When our stories connect, we find a little bit more community and a little bit more hope that we will be okay."
Corey Mettler
MA, LPC, Adoption Therapist, Families Forever Counseling
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"I feel like some adopted teens say they cannot overcome, but yeah you can! The stories in this book are both inspiring and encouraging and will tell you you can do it."
Gertie (19)
Ethiopia
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"I know that other kids get adopted, but used to think that I was alone in what I was feeling and that everyone else had an easier life. I just couldn't imagine people hurting like I did."
Melissah (20)
Domestic
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"The writing grabbed me. Because my kids don't open up and share, this helped me better understand my kids. The stories gave me insight into what some adopted teens are experiencing and thinking about and seldom are willing to share."
Mom of two adopted from Guatemala
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The fact that adopted teens share their stories is a fantastic bridge to other teens. The first step in adoptee healing is hearing the story of another adoptee. Fabulous resource!
Sherrie Eldridge
Author of Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish their Parents Knew
“If you know others are dealing with it, it feels more normal. You think, Wow! I can work through it too. Adoptive parents will like this book, too, to see how they can better understand the adoptee experience.”
Lera (19)
Russia
“This book is easy to read and filled with affirming aha moments. When our stories connect, we find a little bit more community and a little bit more hope that we will be okay.”
Corey Mettler
MA, LPC, Adoption Therapist, Families Forever Counseling
“I feel like some adopted teens say they cannot overcome, but yeah you can! The stories in this book are both inspiring and encouraging and will tell you you can do it.”
Gertie (19)
Ethiopia
“I know that other kids get adopted, but used to think that I was alone in what I was feeling and that everyone else had an easier life. I just couldn’t imagine people hurting like I did.”
Melissah (20)
Domestic
“The writing grabbed me. Because my kids don’t open up and share, this helped me better understand my kids. The stories gave me insight into what some adopted teens are experiencing and thinking about and seldom are willing to share.”
Mom of two adopted from Guatemala
The fact that adopted teens share their stories is a fantastic bridge to other teens. The first step in adoptee healing is hearing the story of another adoptee. Fabulous resource!
Sherrie Eldridge
Author of Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish their Parents Knew
Hello! I’m Susan. Welcome, and thanks for visiting!
I’ve put together a collection of stories for teens told to me by adoptees from across the country. Let me just say loudly that these people are AMAZING and INSIGHTFUL. They taught me so much, which in turn I share with you. I love it when people use their stories to lift others up. In We’ve Been There, teens 16 and older will find a range of stories that truly reflects how adoptees feel and process things in their teen years. It is a long-overdue connection point, a gift from one adoptee to another to remind them they are not alone.
I am a Michigander: Midwest kind and smiley, except in February when I get a little ornery from the gray sky and knee-deep snow. I am married to Mike, and we have three children who were adopted from Russia. We like watching movies together, hanging by the campfire, mountain biking, and traveling internationally. I have an MA in communications and co-authored Before You Were Mine: Discovering Your Adopted Child’s Lifestory, published by Zondervan. I’ve always sought ways to help my kids process this piece of their story.
I love receiving comments. Let me know how this book has encouraged you.